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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29287425">"I Thought You Were Dead"</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hollenka99/pseuds/Hollenka99'>Hollenka99</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Creator AU [24]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Jacksepticeye Power Hour (Web Series), Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen, implied/referenced trauma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 05:35:00</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>717</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29287425</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hollenka99/pseuds/Hollenka99</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Marvin and Jackie discuss the one question that's been plaguing Jackie since he was taken by Anti.</p><p>A request from Bupine on Tumblr using the prompt "I thought you were dead."</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jackieboy Man &amp; Marvin the Magnificent (Jacksepticeye Power Hour)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Creator AU [24]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1277966</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>"I Thought You Were Dead"</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Marvin's entrance into the room should have been expected. The magician seemed to make it his mission to ensure Jackie was doing okay. Having been back home for over a month by now, he should be used to this. However, he really doubts he ever will.</p><p>"I'd prefer to be alone."<br/>"You might prefer it but I don't think it would be wise to do that today."<br/>"I can handle myself." Jackie snaps back.<br/>"Fine, put it this way: you don't deserve to left to face today on your own."<br/>"Thanks for your concern but I'm fine."<br/>"Bullshit." He can hear Marvin's scowl. "If anything, this is probably the one day of the year you'd be the least fine. It's the anni-"<br/>"Yes, I know. I was there. Fuck off already."</p><p>Accepting his friend wouldn't back down, Jackie sits up while refusing to meet Marvin's eyes. "Can I ask you something?"<br/>"Of course. What is it?"<br/>"Why-" He yet again debates whether he should go there. It seems unfair but this has been bothering him for months. He wants to know at last. With a troubled sigh, Jackie rips the plaster off. "Why did you stop looking for me?"</p><p>He risks a glance up. And oh, that appears to have really hit a sore spot.</p><p>"We didn't- There were some things that came up and temporarily stalled us but we never stopped trying to find you."<br/>"Like Chase."<br/>"Well... Chase showed up, sure. But that was in April. That doesn't acknowledge the way I spent that entire first night searching for you or all the hours I put in to try find any kind of lead."<br/>"Right."</p><p>Hands are on his shoulders now. "Jackie, I thought you were dead. I mean, we thought you were dead."<br/>"...Really?" Why does he seem surprised to learn that? He vanished one night and remained missing for nearly 11 months. Assuming the worst was a fairly rational thing to do.<br/>"Or- or at least that it was a very real possibility."</p><p>Oh, now that he's looking at Marvin properly, he can see moisture gathering at the bottom of his eyes. Jackie doesn't speak for a minute.</p><p>"You weren't far off. As surprising as it is, Anti didn't take good care of me."<br/>Marvin fails to be subtle in the way he scrutinises him. "You don't say."<br/>"I... don't want to go into it but yeah, let's just say I don't think I'll ever take a meal for granted again."<br/>"I am going to fucking murder him."<br/>"Can I join you?" Jackie risks a chuckle.</p><p>He stiffens when arms envelop him. They're Marvin's, obviously, but the suddenness of the action triggers a brief second of panic within the teenager. The pressure is somehow nice. Not that he'll readily admit to that. The scars from his birthday scalding reminding him of their existence, he'll keep that a secret from the one who only had good intentions.</p><p>"No matter what he told you, no matter what he did, please don't ever convince yourself we didn't care enough to look. I can't tell you just how much we tried. We all missed you and were so worried. I'll always regret-"</p><p>That's as far as the magician's increasingly trembling voice gets before collapsing in on itself. Jackie reciprocates his friend's grip. Both of their shoulders are becoming slightly damp, courtesy of the other.</p><p>"It's alright."<br/>"It's not though."</p><p>He's right, it is not. The boy hero is no stranger to nightmares or anxiety attacks or acting irrationally aggressive for the sake of somehow protecting himself from further trauma. Both of his legs are fucked thanks to what Anti did to them last November (the anniversary of that is coming up too oh god) and they won't be dealt with professionally for another 11 or so months. The first friend he made, the first person he met after creation even, is in a coma. None of the other egos really know how to handle him nowadays. Marvin tends to be rewarded for his efforts purely because he's one of the only sources of familiarity left over from his life pre-Anti. It is so very not 'alright'.</p><p>"It'll be fine. I'm home now. Don't exactly plan on going anywhere either."<br/>The resulting chuckle is weak. "You'd better not."</p>
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